This year, I turned 30. If I’ve learned only 30 things in my 30 years, that would be quite sad, wouldn’t it? But today, I opened my computer, thought of the first 30 lessons I hold true to my values today, and wanted to share them with you. Maybe it helped you learn something too. Or maybe you disagree with me, and if you do, I hope you tell me. Please tell me if you think I’m wrong, so I can see your perspective and learn more, to apply it to 31. Until then, here’s what I want to give you today & I hope you enjoy:

  1. Everyone has an opinion, and a lot of people will share with you whether or not you asked.
  2. Experience makes life bigger with the saturation is dramatized; the highs are higher, and the lows lower.
  3. Silence can be deafeningly loud and no is a final answer.
  4. You will recognize that people you’ve known for years might not actually be good people, and you will outgrow them.
  5. You will realize your parents are simply humans. A lot of them did the best they could.
  6. Alcohol is poison that’s become socially normalized. It is the modern cigarette. It’s taking more from people than we realize.
  7. You have to develop a personal mind, body, soul connection – whatever that looks like for you. Therapy, gym, prayer, meditation, journaling, etc.
  8. Your body, face, and skin will change over the years. Doing your make-up/hair, styling yourself in quality clothes, getting ample exercise, feeding yourself real food is an intimate art of self-love and caring for yourself. It feels like a hug to yourself saying “I love you and I care about you.” And the more you water your own needs, the bigger your self-worth grows without external validation.
  9. The harder you work on yourself, the more people who lack what you have will attempt to suck that light, energy, and validation from you. See number 3 and learn boundaries when they want to take more than they’ll give.
  10. The romantic relationship recipe is comprised of Compatibility and Chemistry and Love, but these three ingredients I haven’t quick figured out yet. I always get too much of one without enough of the other two. Check back if I have something better to offer at 35. Because of this, my platonic female friendships have taught me so much about gentle and pure love. I feel so much hope and care every day because of my female friends.
  11. Learn how to cook. Cooking is truly not that hard, we have multitudes of free resources to learn, and it isn’t a flex to say you never use your kitchen, or to be a picky eater as a grown adult. Tough love, but its true.
  12. You can ask other people for advice, but you don’t always have to take it. And you don’t have to ask for advice, or permission in order to make a decision that’s best for you.
  13. You can tell sooner than you want to believe it, when someone doesn’t love you. Platonic, or romantic. Let it go. Related: If a friend is not kind, or doesn’t listen to your needs, is that truly a friend?
  14. Just because you place the expectation on someone, it is not their responsibility to rise up to that.
  15. Being soft is as brave as being strong.
  16. Being quick to forgive instead of being angry when its justified will only hurt yourself. Unexpressed anger and frustration due to people pleasing materializes to anxiety. Speak up.
  17. One foot in front of the other to take one decision at a time compounds and before you know it, you’re in a better place.
  18. Lifting weights/strength training as a woman is so cool and so important
  19. Living, aging, being alive is all a miracle. It is a MIRACLE that I am writing this, and that you are reading it and that we’re both breathing.
  20. Learn from the past, instead of worry. Cultivate the future, instead of worry. Enjoy the present.
  21. You’re probably not drinking enough water, or eating enough protein.
  22. People everywhere are hurting. Please be kind as a default.
  23. Someone’s inability to see your worth is none of your business.
  24. There is so much more to life than the small bubble in where the majority of our minds live. Tree roots look like human veins. We are all connected. Love is God is us. So no, it doesn’t matter that we have to wait 30 minutes for the dinner table, or that Taylor Swift released a new album, or that your arms look fat in that picture. We are matter on a floating rock.
  25. You cannot successfully navigate this world and achieve true joy without believing it is being led by a Higher Power (in my case, I call Him God and Jesus and He provides everything. But as a Christian, I am told to love one another, so I respect your journey, whatever that may look like to you.)
  26. Financial literacy is hot and we can learn it.
  27. Sleep affects me more now than it ever has.
  28. Respect other’s time. Time is valuable. If you are late a couple of times, that’s excusable, but if continue to show up tardy to things, you’re saying with your actions, that you don’t respect the other people.
  29. Energy is constantly flowing, so lead with love to keep it going. Never keep a positive thought about someone else inside your head. If you think the compliment, tell the person. You never know who might have really needed to hear it, and they will spread the positivity forward.
  30. It’s okay to admit you’re smart and you should, but please do not think you have all the answers. On the contrary, navigate life as a forever student because there is always more that can be learned and improved.

God bless you & thank you for taking the time to read this.

Hi, I'm Alex! 🙂

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